Each year on Memorial
Lay in the United States and Remembrance Lay in Canada, thousands
of individuals travel to local cemeteries and memorial parks to
pay their respects to departed family members and friends, This
once-a-year event, originally established to honor our war dead,
signals the time for taking plants to gravesites, placing flowers
in columbarium vases and meditating in churches and chapels,
Visits to final resting
places, however, are not limited to just this one day. Throughout
the year people remember those who are no longer with them by
going to the areas where special memorials have been established.
Remembering those who
have died is not a modern day phenomenon, 'thousands of years
ago when the funeral pyre and the "sacred flame" were
used, survivors fashioned beautiful urns to hold the cherished
remains from what they termed the "purifying fire,"
Today, cremation has
advanced from the crude funeral pyre to modern scientific methods.
It is only in the handling of those "cherished remains"
that we link up with the past. We recognize as did those long-ago
individuals the importance of memorialization.
Survivor
Trauma
Those who say - whether
in jest or seriously - "just cremate me and throw me out!"
do not realize the burden this places on family members. Direct
disposal of cremated remains without funerals or memorialization
of any kind can cause serious traumatic problems for survivors.
An executive of the Forum for Death Education tells of one patient
under therapy as a result of scattering the cremated remains of
a loved one, She had no focal point for her grief until he suggested
that she obtain a niche at a local mausoleum and place some memento
of the loved one within
In day-to-day contact
with bereaved families, many cemeteries have noticed signs of
severe emotional stress among the survivors in instances of cremation
without. memorialization and without funerals. In some cases,
such problems may take the form of delayed reaction many month
later and are more apt to come to the attention of the medical
community or clinical psychologists than to the layman or the
general public.
Many psychiatrists
fed the funeral serves a very real need for the survivors, One
of them stated that the primary purpose of the funeral is to fulfill
the need for grieving for the living and that this need goes unfulfilled
for many in our culture. The result, in marry cases, is that months
or years later people require psychiatric treatment for severe
depression.

In suffering a loss,
the traditional rites of passage and memorialization can be beneficial
in helping individuals pass through the stages of grief.
When the practice of
cremation is accomplished with human dignity and recognition,
it will
- help assuage grief
- alleviate guilt
- contribute to emotional
stability
- create peace of
mind
Cremation
Today
Worldwide, cremation
has rapidly expanded. Since 1973, the number of cremations in
North America has more than tripled, Countries such as japan (97%),
Great Britain (70%) and Scandinavia (over 65%) continue to show
a high percentage rate of cremations. It is predicted that by
the year 2025, cremations in the U.S. will be over 40%.
Many well-known Americans
have selected cremation following their deaths and are memorialized
in prominent U.S. cemeteries. They include statesman, prominent
military persons, as well as many from the field of sports and
entertainment.
Cremation
With Memorialization
Nowadays you have
a wide choice on where to place cremated remains. You may select
a niche in columbarium with space for one, two or even an entire
family You may choose interment in a single burial site, an urn
garden or family plot. You may prefer scattering in a specially
prepared garden within cemetery grounds, with or without a marker.
You may even select a personal type of memorialization, such as
a tree, rose bush or other type of perennial to plant in a special
area. What ever your decision, you will have created a lasting
memorial that will serve as a focal point not only for present-day
survivors, but also for future generations.
*This pamphlet
is posted with permission from http://www.cremationassociation.org
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